Friday, January 10, 2014

Do You See?



It's Friday.  Where hundreds of writers come together every week over at the lovely Lisa-Jo Baker's blog to spend five minutes writing about one thing.  One word.  No hyper-editing.  No getting in your own way.  Just writing, flat out.  The most important rule: encourage the writer who linked up before you.  Won't you join us?





Today's prompt: See


GO:

It was a question that darkened the corners of my mind during those long winter months with the sub-artic temperatures.  Do they see me?  The moms at the play dates chasing their kids around the mat room.  The family members on the phone as I listen to countless stories of heartache and worry, uttering prayers they'll never hear, never know about. My two little beacons of joy, running around the house chasing each other with boundless energy.

These people I do life with, do they see me as an open book or a closed door? Do they see my spirit reaching out between the lines and words, searching for that glimpse of grace? That knowing nod that says, "I get you. I'm here."

When I put on a brave face for my oldest son after he tells me he was teased on the bus ride home, does he see how my heart breaks, how I long to wrap him in my arms and protect him from the evil of this world, from ever being sad or lonely or rejected?

As I look at my blog statistics and see the numbers plummet, the comments non-existent, I wonder if people see what I'm trying to convey. Does the essence of my message shine through the black and white on the page?

Suddenly, I hear a whisper coming through the dark thoughts, first so faint I can barely hear it, then louder, clearer. 

"I see you."

"I have searched you."

"You are mine."

As the tears stream down, I am filled with gratitude that He found me.  That he chose me.  And through his grace, I see that I am part of something even greater than I can imagine. Each act of love, each step to reach out made through Him. He knows. He sees. He will shine.

STOP.



8 comments:

  1. Visiting from 5 minute friday Abigail <3 How lovely! I am not a mom, but I am a teacher and am around so many students and teachers all day long. I often wonder the same thing. I walk through the hallways and wonder if I go unnoticed. I sit and my desk and wonder the same thing. Thank you for reminding me that He see's us and he loves us and that is what truly maters <3 Veronica

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    1. Thank you so much for stopping here, Veronica! It's nice to know there are other women out there who struggle with these thoughts. Praise God for his love.

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  2. I've got the same thoughts over here. It's hard to not harbor bitterness over feeling like we're not receiving validation or being seen. Thanks for the reminder that God always sees even if we can't tell if anyone else does.

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    1. Thank you for stopping by, Jennifer. This community is such a blessing.

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  3. I think we've all been in a place where we have felt unseen and wonder if anyone ever does. Good thoughts.

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    1. Thanks so much for stopping here, Jessica. It's wonderful to know I'm not alone in these thoughts but also that God has redeemed and loves me.

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  4. Abigail, as I read down your post and listened to your feelings of invisibility, I began to think "He sees you," and then you burst forth with His words, "I see you." By now, the tears were streaming here too. Thanks for a beautifully written post. Good to connect via FMF.

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    1. I'm so grateful for the FMF community! Thanks for your comment. I'm glad it connected with you.

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